Sunday, December 23, 2007

hell...

throat : hurts like hell...

mood : as hot as hell...

feeling : as shit as hell...

hell i don't even know how it feels to be in hell...who cares..its just a description!

Friday, December 21, 2007

bleeding love + empty....

who's there...who can be there...where am i..where are u....

Leona Lewis - Bleeding love http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sF84pIhP5UM

The Click Five - Empty http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJWIVUt1Pq0

Caved...

When ur fustrated even small little things irritates you BIG TIME...even the Butches and the Sissies you see along the shopping centre pisses u off BIG TIME...and I just feel like give them a tight slap and ask " WAT THE FUCK is wrong with you! Y go against your nature..who or what you are born or born with!" i mean no offences with these catogeries of people..just that they happen to irritate me the most at tt point of time because there are so many fucking things i cannot understand...much less these people of why they chose to be the opposite sex or something which i definately can never understand and i don't think i want to even try to understand cause it's a NO to me...

Wat's with life anyways...is there any once in a point of time where things just go smoothly!! wat the fuck is with it anyway...why do people like to put words in their mouth and spit them out!! i mean yes i myself often do as well...but i just can't stand it when people don't understand...try talking to my mom and you'll understand what i mean...which is already half the fustration...

If given a chance i would not want to be born in this kind of life...so what if u have the luxuries...so what if your blessed with fortune...SO WHAT! SO WHAT IF PEOPLE KEEP ASSUMING OR CATOGERIZING THAT YOU ARE ANOTHER CLASS OF PEOPLE! SO WHAT! arn't all of us humans..and even so everyone is still different!!

I know certain problems and certain situations are just short lived and things will get over soon...but what is the future then?? what will it be like?? I fucking don't know and don't understand as well!...i fucking don't even understand myself!! putting up with so many things that i just keep trying to conveince (probably spelt it wrongly but WTF who cares!) myself with!...really sick with this kind of life at times..or most of the time...

Sometimes u just get jealous over small little things that people do or things u see or envy...and you would just want it or d'like to have it as well and when you don't, you just get fustrated and sad and all the crap shit feelings...

My mom say's i shouldn't be so independant and settle things myself...she says it has made me look older than my elder bro..but what the heck...can't people understand i'm trying to be independant and not relying on anyone!!...i expect of people too much and when people don't do it they unknowingly disappoint me alot cause i always expect either ALL or NOTHING at all...i think MAYBE i should start expecting nothing and instead from myself...at least when i'm disappointed i don't blame anyone but myself...

FUCK IT MAN..just damm fustrated with everything in life...i'm going into my own cave...

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

against whatever comes...

As i put it back on once more...
I suddenly felt all the weight...sorrows and hopes within it...
It all felt so heavy...so heavy...
That i almost forgot the weight of the burden...

I've rested enough...
and it's time to move on from where i stopped
plus a new direction....

weights, burdens all becomes a challenge...
sorrows and sadness all becomes feelings of the past...
hope has always been the future...
but future to what, who, where, how, why...
all still remains a mystery...
that will only be solved through time...