一個沒資格去愛別人的人...

Been thinking a lot recently…and I’m really lost and still lost…deep down inside I’m still as unhappy as the first time I came in…maybe it’s cause I didn’t get what I want to get…I didn’t find what I wanna find…or maybe I care too much about how others see me as…

Sum how in the process, I’ve lost myself and now I don’t have my own identity…I really wish there really is sum1 who can tell me what you see in me and what do my eyes tell you…

Someone told me not to depend on others to make myself happy…and I finally understood the meaning of it…I donno since when, I always try to be lame and joke around to make people laugh so that some how, I can feed on their happiness and be happy as well…but then the fact is that I’m running away from reality…the fact is that happiness comes from within oneself…

And that you can never bring another person happiness when you yourself aren’t even happy at all…


I’m actually laughing at myself and happy that I was rejected because I wasn’t fit to love anyone at all because I did not understand the above concept…and even if I do now…I don’t know where my happiness is or where it lies…

I’m too ashamed to face my group mates or even my friends or those who I really care a lot…sometimes I thought of isolating from them so that it would be better…but I don’t wanna be irresponsible and throw them aside…

Like I always say…it’s not nice to know me too well or even know me at all…because all I ever bring is sorrow and sadness…and I take away peoples happiness…